Another great night at the Triad Fitness Center and the Thomasville YMCA. It still amazes me that we went through the seven chakras in seven months and now are almost done with our first month of the Yamas and Niyamas.
For me, self love is a very tricky subject. I feel like I do a pretty good job of supporting myself in my job (middle school math/science teacher), in leading yoga classes, and in other ventures in my life. The hardest part for me is when there are no distractions and you are left by yourself. It happens late at night for me. It is bedtime, but I can’t shut my brain off. I often let things creep in that can frustrate me and spiral into a sense of doubt and lack of competency. I sit almost lost as the minutes and hours pass by on occasion. I’ve become accustomed to equating love with the amount of tasks I completed in the day. I don’t know where the idea came from, but that is how my brain functions. I wish it would let me be content. Self love is often difficult for me. However, I do truly hold on to the notion that for me to give love to others that I must first love myself. It excites me to know that I will have more to give when I can reflect during those quiet times.
Here is our meditation from tonight. Enjoy! Namaste :).
Mantra – I am excited about my incompetencies.
How we treat oursleves is in truth how we treat those around us. If you are a taskmaster with yourself, otherws will feel your whip. If you are critical of yourself, others will feel your high expectations of themselves as well. If you are light hearted and forgiving with yourself, others will feel the ease and joy of being with you. If you find laughter and delight in yourself, others will be healed in your presence.
Love lies at the core of nonviolence and begins with our love of self. Not a love that is ego-centric but a love that is forgiving and lenient; a love that sees the humor in the imperfections and accepts the fullness of the human expression. Finding this love for all the parts of ourselves means we have to forgive ourselves. Without forgiveness, we carry guilt like a heavy burden around our hearts. Guilt holds our love for self and others hostage and keeps us bound to a one-sided expectation of the human experience.
Our inability to love and accept all the pieces of ourselves creates ripples – tiny acts of violence – that have huge and lasting impacts on others. Attempts to change the self, rather than love the self, keeps us trapped in vicious cycles that we can’t crawl out of.
Where fear creates harm and violence, love creates expansion and nonviolence and the true safety that we seek. Nonviolence is woven with love, and love of other is woven with love of self; these cannot be separated.
Book – “The Yamas and Niyamas” by Deborah Adele